PistolPacking

Ever felt guilty about buying locally and saving the planet? Worry no more!

In a bold move against the tyranny of sustainability, we proudly introduce PistolPacking – the world’s most environmentally unfriendly shipping option. Why minimise your carbon footprint when you can have your items delivered with the maximum possible environmental impact?

Photo by Casey Horner on Unsplash

How It Works

At PistolPacking, we're turning the table on eco-friendly practices. Simply choose your product, and we'll ensure it takes the longest, most pollution-intensive route possible. We exclusively use vehicles running on diesel, ensure each item travels through at least five logistical hubs (regardless of origin and destination proximity), and guarantee each package is wrapped in an excessive amount of unrecyclable materials.

Features

  • 📦
    Exclusive use of vintage 1980s delivery trucks – no efficient engines here!
  • 🌎
    Each shipment comes with a "Track the Damage" feature, showing the real-time environmental impact your package is making across the globe.
  • 🔥
    Double-wrap option – because one layer of plastic is never enough.

About Us

At PistolPacking, we’re committed to walking (or driving, rather extensively) down the path least eco-friendly. No effort is spared in ensuring our service strives for the zenith (or nadir, depending on your view) of environmental disregard.

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